Opinion: Walking the Walk

Some stories just need to be told from the writer's pen. They are the tales that are best said when the reader can relate to the writer, even have an "Oh, really" moment recognizing he or she has human characteristics like everyone else.

Today, mine is to admit philosophers like Friedrich Nietzsche understood life, but was also a little whacked. I will always remember a quote from Nietzsche, thank you to my history professor in college, who said "sometimes people have to be forced to be free." Forced... to be free. Why should someone have to be forced to be free, unless they have never had freedom, and then who decides what is freedom?

It doesn't make sense on face value. Why should someone have to be forced into freedom? Think a little further. Think on the people any of us know who are content well below what they are probably capable of. Some people thrive on obsessively finding every detail in a job, and others need that crisis moment to apply the stress of not knowing.

If I recall, this is not Nietzsche's intent, but it does have some application. 

So why force people to change? Is it a "choice" of society, meaning the person progresses to the point where good enough is no longer good enough, or is the obligation a deliberate move by some definition of power players? 

What if this question could be applied to several levels of life? You go as far as you can without a hard right and find yourself watching for an unexpected opportunity. When it does, you just know for the stress and learning curve that might occur, this is it. You decide life as you're living it, needs a change. I once heard "a rut is a grave with the ends knocked out." Sometimes this journey called life is defined at its simplest by admitting it is fluid. We do well, settle our own minds, to admit change is a part of life. 

This week is one is a reminder of how we sometimes have to be forced to face what has happened in life; not just face it, but keep moving forward. Losing a child tends to change the definition of time itself. For us, my wife and I at least, the incident took place yesterday and several years ago. 

So how does quotes like Nietzsche's and the grief of loss meet in the same moment? Most men are wired to think if it is a problem, there is also a solution, a way to fix it. There is a sign in many home garages of the several wrenches, or hammers: a little loose, tighter, close and the heck it won't fit.

That doesn't work with emotions. People who are wired to think mechanically have to accept that parts of life cannot be fixed with a name brand box wrench. Some parts are bandaged by having someone stand in the gap with you, someone who understands the pain, maybe understands it deeply enough words are not necessary.

Forgive the Old English for a moment and hear the message: blessed are they who mourn, for they will be comforted. You don't lose the memories of who you lost. You focus on living with the memories.